Mmmmmm … tears

Like so many other Canadians, and citizens in countries around the world, I offer my profound thanks to the American electorate for making the right decision. After the past eight years, a lot of us doubted you could arise from what seemed a collective stupor in time to act to preserve the ideals of the [...]

The top ten Roger Clemens-Mindy McCready unreleased country songs

We’re going for a lighter mood these days, like I mentioned last time. So in honour of this sordid affair, we present the top ten country songs Mindy McCready could record about her relationship with “Rocket” Roger Clemens:
10. “I Was Hit By Your Pitch But I Won’t Take My Base”
9. “You Put It Straight Down [...]

NHL trade deadline haikus

Are there two things on this Earth that go together more perfectly than sports commentary and Japanese poetry? Besides, with all the words that we wasted yesterday discussing these trades ad nauseum, I figured I would cut back and improve my literary footprint.
So, here is my commentary on the major trades of yesterday’s NHL frenzy, [...]

Why are Hillary Clinton’s internet videos so terrible that it hurts my soul?

If you thought political advertising was all the same; just a bunch of catchphrases spouted by white people over a swirling musical score and images of Good People doing Good Thing and having Good Times and Prosperity …
… well …
You don’t know Hillary Clinton.
These two videos are both Internet advertisments for her campaign. The first [...]

More Idiots Write About Harry Potter

Far be it from me to take issue with the inanity of an article that appears in the Sunday Star … but one begins to wonder after a while if that paper (interesting as it sometimes is) is becoming the newspaper equivalent of academics who talk to hear the sound of their own voices spouting [...]

Understated, non-hockey, nationalistic pride

I will try to keep this short, but there are many reasons that I like my country. I won’t go off and reflect all emotionally on it, because it’s not like that, really. Canadians tend to leave that to other countries who take a more, shall we say, vocal stance on why their country is [...]

You got served, Potter!

Since the latest movie opens this week and the final Harry Potter book is only a few weeks away, it seems like a suitable time to smack the little boy wizard back to his rightful place. Just so he doesn’t get out of line.
In a poll taken in Britain, Harry Potter is only the third-best [...]

Ten Inconvenient Psychological Truths

I try to avoid writing about science. For two reasons. One, because I don’t have time to call people and interview them for this blog. And two, because I went to Ryerson, so if I’m going to write about science, I generally like to have someone on hand to, y’know, ’splain it to me.
But this [...]

Jesus vs. Harry .. Final Battle … FIGHT!

There are bad Christians and good Christians in this world. It’s tough to tell them apart sometimes, unless they’re American and willing to tell you who got their vote. They go to the same churches, believe in the same God and support the same damned sandal-wearing hippy that supposedly makes it possible for me to [...]

It’s a beautiful day in MY neighbourhood, asshole.

Yeah … it’s all Mr. Rogers’ fault that I’m an entitled jerk, along with the rest of my generation.
It couldn’t possibly be that recent generations have been coddled by parents who are afraid the kids will phone Child Services if they spank them.
It couldn’t possibly be the teachers, who are forced to push students through [...]